The Night Before Christmas (A Rodent’s Tale)

I wrote the following whimsical, nutty poem many years ago when my two oldest sons were in elementary school. Every Christmas Eve my family reads this poem along with the traditional Night before Christmas and the Christmas story in the Bible.

Christmas Eve, and Papa Mouse

Is at work throughout the house

Gathering up presents for the little mice

Yummies that will taste so nice.

Oh look! There’s a piece of cheese

(So dusty it will make a mouse sneeze!)

Oh yay! A crust of bread

(So moldy it looks quite dead.)

To make a long story short

Of Christmas presents found, there’s no news to report

Papa found absolutely nothing, zero, none

It looked like mouse Christmas would be no fun.

But then Papa heard a strange sort of noise

Perhaps it was stirring little mouse boys?

But no, he heard it again, but louder now

And down the chimney it came with a pow!

There he was, covered in soot, dressed in red, big as a cat–

But no!, to Papa’s horror, it was Santa Rat!

With long, shiny whiskers, and a skinny long tail

“Curses,” yelled Papa, “he’ll see me without fail!”

But Santa Rat didn’t see him, just heard a yell,

From who, in the dark room, he couldn’t quite tell.

But then he saw a shivering frightened mouse

And asked, matter-of-factly, “how many mice in this house?”

“And where are the stockings, hanging about the room?”

“I’ve go to fill them and go—zoom, zoom, zoom!”

Papa, however, was amazed by the thing with the hat

and red coat, the jolly fat pack-rat.

Santa Rat said, “Don’t just stand there, give me a hand!”

“I’ve got many more stops tonight in winter mouse-land.”

So Papa came and helped him unload

The bag so big it was ready to explode

With toys and candy, and other mouse yummies

Just waiting for morning, and hungry mouse tummies.

Then up the chimney went that jolly old rat

And upon his sleigh the fat rat sat.

Then off he flew to other rodent houses

To ensure that Christmas morn would have many happy mouses.

And Papa heard him exclaim, as he went from sight:

“May your Christmas be ever so nice,”

“One and all,”

“Christmas rats and merry mice!”

About theamericanplutarch

Writer, thinker, historian.
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